Becoming unoffendable is part of a maturing Christian’s life. We are called to be a people who are ‘set apart’, different and not to conform to the pattern of this world. This sounds good, it sounds right but the reality is that it’s not easy! The reason why is that we keep some of our natural self in the foreground of life, when in fact Paul tells us in Romans we must die to self. That means taking the back seat, for we have given up many, if not all of our rights. Consequently others are perfectly within their rights to offend us, and we have no rights (we are dead) and we should not defend the rights that we don’t have. By now you may be feeling your blood beginning to boil, please allow me to explain. When somebody offends us it is because they have done something which we have chosen to take offense with. This is a choice or decision we make, based on our thinking, it’s not a decision based on Jesus’ teaching or character.

The problem with taking offense is that we are already into at least two levels of sin by the time we feel offended. Roy Waldrom wrote many times on this website about judgment, unforgiveness and bitterness which all relate and weave into the subject of becoming unoffendable.

Jesus seems very strong in his language on this subject so we can conclude this is very important to Him. He is even strong with himself to not judge before the appointed time. When Jesus judges he knows all the facts and is loving, righteous, and without sin or stain or blemish.

To make it even easier to understand, I simply ask myself if I should be wearing a Judge or magistrate’s wig and gown, as Jesus himself said if we call our brother Racha it may have bad consequences. (Matt 5:22). His reason for telling us not to judge is wonderfully kind and loving towards us. He knows the trouble it will get us into in this life and beyond. He does not want to have to judge you or me using the measure you or I have used against others in this life on that fateful Day when our hope is for mercy and to receive our inheritance.

How does all this tie into becoming unoffendable? If I let myself judge  someone for their action(s) towards me or someone I feel I am responsible for, I’m already in sin! Remember the unmerciful Servant in Matthew 18. Read it all but focus on verse 33 to 35 and meditate on it in context with the passage as a whole. This is deadly serious stuff.

I should not have judged the person but have given grace, and forgiven them totally from the heart as it happened by choice. I should keep no record of wrongs and instead shown them love. If we don’t it can progress to unforgiveness, and whether they have the right to do or say that or not! This is beginning to sound like law and I’d like to say clearly that I DO NOT WANT TO BE UNDER LAW! Please Lord, keep me in and under your grace.

Unforgiveness has added itself to judgment, and these two are now centre stage, and they will manage your actions and produce bad fruit. It wont be long before the unforgiveness and judgment lead to bitterness, then slander and gossip can begin to defile many people, both in the Body and not yet in the Body. Yet Jesus commanded us NOT to do either of these things.

Overcoming an issue like this is all about the choices we make. We can chose to be offended, or we can chose not to take offence, and receive Kingdom help in this very situation. Jesus has covenanted with us, we need to take His commands seriously as we pray to see His Kingdom come, wherever we are. How can it come if we are not living like Kingdom People?

Remember you and I were once sinners. All have sinned and fallen short of the Glory of God, and the wages of sin is death. That was our condition until Jesus took our sin away and covered our sin with his Blood, extending to us His Amazing Grace and forgiveness. FREE! Remember, freely you have received, now freely give.

Something in us may still be longing for its pound of flesh, even though we know our battle is not against flesh and blood….. Because we have received Jesus’ gift of love and forgiveness we are called to love and forgive others totally from the heart. I have to stop myself from judging others, and give grace; to be patient and kind, responding with love and Wisdom. Defence, attack, or any offensive countermeasure, will all lead to further sin. Let the offence be like water off a ducks back, don’t let it in! Hear what is said, and as you listen keep the channel open to the King and His Spirit, asking for wisdom and guidance. Then you will know how to respond, and it will be in love and not law, grace and not judgment. You can now be part of the solution and not add to the problem.

It may well become clear that the person is actually quite hurt and needs love, help and kindness (which will turn away wrath). What they don’t need is a rebuke at this stage. If we don’t lean on our own understanding, actions and solutions to the problem, the channel is still open to the King, and He will give us words of knowledge, wisdom, strategy and guidance. Most of all what is usually needed is someone who will not judge, but will listen. As an example; What might happen if in tune with the Holy Spirit, awaiting his prompting, you said to the person “I’m sorry I’ve offended you, would you help me by explaining to me what I did that caused you to be so angry with me, would you let me buy you a coffee and talk it through, please?”

You are the one with the “words of eternal life” in this situation. Listen patiently and carefully to their complaint or story (it may take more than one cup of coffee.. or tea for us English) and do not defend yourself, try to understand, and keep asking the Spirit to reveal the nature of woundedness in them or us! Take the low road. The more you listen, the more you will understand their condition. Compassion, love, and a deep desire to help will begin to rise within you.

You never know where this is going to go. It may lead to salvation, another meeting, more coffee, them becoming one of your disciples who you may have the joy of leading to Jesus over the coming moments, weeks, decade when they become one of His Disciples, They may even become a life long friend.

A problem situation or offence has now become a God sent opportunity for us to do the very work that Jesus told us to do. How did it start? The person was trying to offend you, an action born of some hurt in them, or a wrong action from you! We are still works in progress as they are. We see Light triumph over darkness and His Kingdom come, on Earth as it is in Heaven! The enemy has lost territory. Not to mention the “Joy Inexpressible” of seeing someone who was lost, found! To God be the Glory.

Kindness, gentleness, humility, mercy are His hallmarks in Matt 11:28 and Matt 18. It’s amazing how powerful these attributes are as Kingdom assets when used in the world, against the kingdom of darkness. They have divine power!

It’s also a paradox that while we are still rejoicing that we are no longer under Law, how often as Church we resort to Law to put others in their place And try to claim the higher ground! I am learning, slowly, that the Law is now nailed to the Cross, and the weapons we fight with are not the weapons of this world.

Allow me to share a testimony:

I shared this revelation at a men’s group in my home town. The men listened attentively until there was an eruption against what I was saying! I did not take offence. I honoured the four men who had risen up in protest listening to their protestations and defence of their right to be offended and retaliate, to react, rebuke, have their say, and the like. When they had all finished, I said OK. Let’s ask the Holy Spirit be the arbiter of this issue. I prayed that in the days ahead we would all (me included) see situations where we put into practice what I had been teaching.

A week later I have a call from the group leader to come and share further, as there had been quite a reaction. I agreed, not knowing if I was going to be stoned, or attend an inquisition! We reached the point where I was invited to speak. I opened my mouth and the first previous protestor asked if he could share something……. I agreed. He brought an amazing testimony concerning a man who worked with him who was using foul language and blasphemed. The protester proclaimed his right to defend the Name of Jesus, I understand that. The next day the man continued to do more of the same, so the day after our earlier meeting, the protester was ready to defend the name of Jesus vigorously, and at that moment felt the grace of the Holy Spirit fill his heart. He put into practice what we had discussed, the guy accepted the invitation for a coffee and they talked it all through with mutual honour and respect and a lot of listening.

As the protester began to understand this mans story his heart was filled with compassion. He testified the foul language had stopped totally without him even mentioning the subject, they were meeting together regularly at break time, and the once blaspheming man’s faith journey was underway. He even said they had become good friends. I prefer to say he was beginning to disciple this guy out of darkness and into the Kings Glorious Light. Each of the other three shared concerning how the problems they had spoken so strongly in defence of their right to be offended were now producing good lasting fruit. In every situation when I last enquired they were still moving forward. They all said the outcomes they witnessed were unbelievable in their own understanding, and were totally of God.

This approach also has one huge final blessing in its wings. If you find yourself rising up against an offence directed towards you, stop and take stock. What just happened? The reason why this is so important is this situation has just highlighted a tender spot or wound in your innermost being. Now you know it’s there you can deal with it and be free of it and another stain or blemish in/on the Bride bites the dust. It really is win win.

To God be the Glory.

Do let me know how you feel about what I have shared here today.

With much love, Alan
Alan.Vincent@The-Church.net

Roy and I had a number of great conversations and shared many thoughts and ideas which God had imparted to us through his Word. We also discussed new and innovative ways of displaying spiritual concepts and teaching diagrammatically in a simple, farm house cooking way of sharing the message God is revealing in these days. He showed me the illustration he had done of the tree of life, and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, and how we respond to these two sources in the garden. Also, the clear linkage between these two trees and the life, or lack of it, we struggle with through our desire to base even our Spiritual thinking on knowledge and our own understanding. Roy had realised that although we symbolically put ourselves to death when we come to Christ, and go through the waters of Baptism, it seems that some bits of the old man will not lie down. This is particularly evident when we hit a new occurrence of an old problem that predates our salvation. It’s almost as if in some cases we can’t resist the impulse to go back past the cross to our old solution to the problem which is part of our former life, and not part of our renewed life in Christ. We find ourselves re-importing the old mans thinking and understanding and mind set into the new renewed mind that Christ is brining into being within us. Have a look at the illustration below which�I showed Roy and which built on�his graphic to make�this point very strongly.

Let me know what you think. If you need any help dealing with this kind of problem or recognise there are things that should have died in your new life but they just keep sitting up again. We would love to help you be free from these persistent old man attitudes and beliefs and agreement. It was for Freedom that Jesus set you free.

Greetings to all you friends of Roy’s and folk who have visited his many articles and teaching over the years. My wife Sue and I with the help of our friend Tim Cutis are going to try and carry on something of the aims of the site to build on the work that Roy started.

I have added a link to a copy of my testimony from�our Chapel web site at�www.The-Church.net�which is a retiring site quite long in the tooth, and being replaced as we speak with a much more contemporary look and feel. Feel free to browse around though and find out more of what we do who we are and how we minister to those God brings us into contact with and beyond.

We have also added a preview of something that Roy initiated�with his diagram about the two trees which you may recall. We have taken that start point and expanded it to illustrate in a graphical way a very common problem that we have experienced in folk who have a faith but find themselves still struggling with some of the things that have roots in their old life and feel they are unable to shake them off in the New Life that Jesus has brought, is bringing and will bring. Let me know what you think.

My Calling

The following are examples of clear direction that has come to me directly by the voice of Jesus, John 10:27 �My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me� or as a prophecy spoken through believers who were used by the Holy Spirit to speak clear direction for my life.
All I have done is receive the words and walk in them.

In 1953 I made a profession of accepting Jesus as my saviour and learned to read by reading a Bible. The first time I read the words of Matthew 6:33 �But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you�. I had an impression that one day that would happen.
That day came in 1965 when we left the job as a carpenter to manage a youth camp and teach children the Bible.
From that day till this all our needs have been supplied including countless thousands of dollars spent in travel around the world
having visited 34 nations including 25 times to the UK.

In Easter 1976. these words came straight to my mind when I told The Lord I was wretched, blind naked and knew it.
John 15:3. You are clean through the Word.

�The message of forgiveness would go around the world�.
These words came out of my mouth as I was speaking in a church service on forgiveness. It was not till some time later I came to understand I would take the message of forgiveness around the world. This has proven to be true.

1 Peter 3:7, �Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered�.
This verse was given to me by a fellow, believer.
I came to understand that unless I live with my wife with understanding as to where she is spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically at all times and protect her He [Father God] would not answer my prayers.

Acts 22:10 �And I said, What shall I do, Lord? And the Lord said unto me Arise, and go into Damascus; and there it shall be told thee of all things which are appointed for thee to do�.
This verse was given to me by a visitor from USA which challenged me with this question
Was I willing to do the will of God with only one question before I did or said anything from that moment on? I said �yes�.

In December 76 in a room full of 100 men the speaker said he would ask Father God for a word for each one, he came to me and said.
�You are going into counselling up to 18 hours a day and you need strength�.
I can testify that this has proven true from that day till this.

In 1976 I was lead to read Jeremiah 1:8 and Ezekiel 3:5-6.
These verses led me to understand that I would have the ministry of a prophet among nations that would know my language.
This has proven to be correct.
In 1984 I was having breakfast with a man who told me I had the anointing of a prophet. He also told me things about how I would respond to life which has proven totally true.

In the last few years have been told many times I am a Father to bring encouragement to other believers.
1 Corinthians 14:15 it says �There are not many fathers�.

In 1977 I as directed to read Psalm 91. The promises of that Psalm have served an anchor within me.

In 1978 I was in a class of children teaching them what we called Bible in Schools.
I knew these children had learned about the living Lord Jesus and would pray knowing they would get answers.
I mentioned I was in need of 10 thousand dollars and I told them I should be working 6 days a week to pay the debt and asked them to pray for me.
One boy stood and said, �God get Uncle Roy some money�
A girl in the front row said, �Are you not suppose to be live by faith?�
I was completely told off by Father God through her.
The following Monday Father God sorted out our finances and we have never been in debt again. All we have needed has been supplied.

There are many other words I have received as I have been out walking and thoughts have popped into my mind that I was not thinking about like �I have added 10 years to your life�. That was 5 years ago.

Another time I was thinking about buying a car and I heard the words, �Why are you limiting me and looking at your own resources?�
I replied �Lord are you telling me to buy a new car� I heard �Yes�
That day I ordered a new Honda Jazz. When it came paid cash. It is now 6 years old done 43,thousand KM and will see us out.

My prayer is that all who read this will get some understanding in how to be guided by the Holy Spirit, either by hearing Jesus, voice which comes as a thought in the mind or a verse of scripture that stands out, or through another human who shares a thought they received as they have been in prayer for me and my situation at that time.
By being obedient to those directions I have enjoy life that can be experience by all who follow the same example.

In times when there has been no clear direction I have sought to walk in the light of the last message received.

Kingdom finance.
Concerning the area of finance, for me it has been
simple.
Matthew 6:33 says that when we seek first His Kingdom and do whatever He requires then all is added. That is a clear promise.
The down side is that when what is needed is not added it is because we are not doing what He requires no matter how spiritual or practical it might seem.

The key is to repent for doing what we thought was His will and remain in repentance till the peace is loud and clear.
Part of repentance is bringing the fruits of repentance
Matthew 3:8, Acts 26:20.
Simple. I have been disobedient, driven by what I believe I should do, or by what others say I should do and trying to meet the needs of others out of one’s soul [human strength]. To put it another way I was working independently of the true living relationship by hearing the voice of Jesus, John 10:27.

So when I repent I ask Jesus to tell me what He wants me to do to prove to him that I am an obedient servant. What thoughts come I believe it is from Him and obey.
For me it is always something simple and practical.
It has never failed.
At all times it is about building the relationship between the
individual believer and Jesus plus dying to self, religion, church and all the things that man does by wrote.

Now at 75 years of age I remember when church was something you attended with others in a church building. The gatherings were basically of 2 kinds, the Catholics, and those who were not. The non Catholic folk were divided into many separate groups, each attending in a building where church was conducted.

The day came when I had a living encounter with the voice of Jesus.
I was in prayer telling Father God I felt wretched, poor, blind and naked before Him. As clear as a person speaking a reply came, �No you are not, you are clean�

John 10:27 that made it clear the human body is his dwelling place and I was anointed [ordained John 15:16] to go and bear fruit as I obeyed Jesus voice.

The first people to come into the same relationship as I did met together in homes usually around a meal.
Acts 20:7 On the first day of the week, when we were gathered together to break bread, Paul talked with them, intending to depart on the morrow; and he prolonged his speech until midnight.
Many of the letters written to churches were addressed to the home where people gathered in a city or locality but not to denominations as we have today.

What divides is what man has created, whether a name, bank account, a constitution or a mission statement.

All the leadership of the early church was a function not an office . It was the anointing people submitted to and there was respect.
It was not about rank, or position.
We read that the greatest among was to serve, not rule over.
To rule in Hebrews means to bring joy, peace, contentment and security, as stated in Hebrews 13, nothing to do with control and domination.

We are told to go into all the world and be salt to flavor and light to see by, not to invite people into a building called a church.
Revelation 3:20 is an interesting verse where we find Jesus outside the church door knocking and inviting people to come out to him.

Today it is so easy to play church and have no inner relationship with The Lord Jesus by the indwelling of the Holy Spirit. Church is mainly a social club that has rules and regulations for membership.

For 11 years my wife and I were full time ministering to young people about what we understood it meant to become a Christian. One day my wife prayed, “Lord your pay is lousy we are doing all this work for you and you do not pay a decent wage”
He replied as a loud thought in her mind “I do not even know you”
She replied, “You are right and I quit”.

To know is to be in intimate relationship, in communication, in fellowship, and to expose one�s innermost being.
This can only take place in a relationship where there is no judgment and unforgiveness. The only one who can do that is Jesus.
We found the above to be true and have lived in that relationship for 46 years.

Every person when born has in their spirit a desire to be loved, accepted and forgiven and looks to man to fulfill that desire.
Because man has a fallen nature that desire is unfulfilled causing disappointment and rejection that leads to depression.
The only one who can truly fulfill that desire is Jesus.

This is why fullness of life will not be found in organized religious systems. It is only by individual relationship with the Lord Jesus that life can truly be fulfilled .

Encounter with death.
For some months I was getting short of breath till it got to the place where I was gasping for breath.
There was o pain, just no energy especially when walking up hill or biking or mowing the lawn.
A visit to the Dr on Wednesday the 12th September revealed I had fluid around my right lung.
I visited the local hospital and then drove to Rotorua Hospital 80km away and was admitted where a tube was inserted into the lung cavity and over the next few days out poured 4 litres of fluid that caused the lung to collapse.

After one week in the Rotorua hospital I was taken for a ride in an ambulance for 1 1/2 hours to Hamilton hospital where they put 3 tubes in me using key hole surgery and some sort of powder glue to stick the lung back in place, which took a week and then they sent me home none the wiser as to why this happened.

I have been on no medication, just rest, lots of it.
Spiritually I know what it was all about; the enemy of my soul wanted me silenced by suffocating the breath of life in me that has set so many free.

Back in September last year I went to get a yellow fever injection so that I could enter Uganda.
The Dr said at my age of 74 it could kill me.
I knew it would not and went on my way.
From that day till Sunday the 7th October 2012 I felt something had entered my body and I was not operating as well as I did and thought age was catching me up.

While in hospital the week of the 19th of September during one night the thought came �are you prepared to accept death�?
My response was �Yes�.
I believed I would go through death and live.

On the 7th October when I woke I felt lifeless. Desperate measures were needed. I call spiritual for spiritual men and women to come and anoint me with oil. Nine came and did so according to James 5.
In the late afternoon a fellow believer who has been praying for me phoned to say that he had a bad witness about what I had done regarding death.
He phoned another believer who said he had run into that same spirit and it was not of God.
While on the Phone I repented of making a covenant with the spirit of death. The person I was speaking with bound the spirit�s power and it left.
I felt life walk back into my body.

The Word says choose life.
De 30:19 I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live:

Another encouraging verse.
Isa 28:18 And your covenant with death shall be disannulled, and your agreement with hell shall not stand; when the overflowing scourge shall pass through, then ye shall be trodden down by it.

16th October 1012.
After spending half an hour with the Dr, the outcome was totally inconclusive.
I shared with the Dr a little of where I am at and he replied, �keep praying and doing what you are doing�. The Dr said he would make further inquiries.
The pain I had that day was to do with the bottom rib on the right side.
It was though it was bruised. The Drs understanding was that when the tube went from my back to the lung cavity it tore the back of the rib.
This discomfort is getting better day by day.

The blood tests have revealing that the kidneys, liver and all other organs are normal. White blood cells a little high but nothing to be concerned about.
The x-rays were inconclusive.

When I asked Jesus if there was any cancer in my body I heard a clear �no my son�. The �my son� is always a clear sign it is Father answering, not me thinking my own thoughts.
The latest outcome is it has been arranged that I have another cat scan on the 7th January to make sure all is OK which we know it will be.

All in all it has been an interesting adventure.

Independence or true freedom.
Adam gave away the freedom he had with the Godhead (Father Son and Holy Spirit) to Satan. From then all who are outside of Christ are deceived and are slaves to Satan and his kingdom.

Man being a created being can never be independent. There is total freedom when he walks in fellowship with his creator. The freedom is to do with living in relationship with the creator and when one does there is a harmony which is the place where love, joy and peace reigns.

When under Satan’s kingdom there is no freedom. There is only law, guilt, rejection, control and condemnation.
My mind went to the verses in Colossians 2:15 to 23, especially 23. Which things have indeed a shew of wisdom in will worship, and humility, and neglecting of the body; not in any honour to the satisfying of the flesh.

There is only one sin, which is the sin of independence resulting in disobedience and rebellion. Once Adam disobeyed and became independent, this started the slide that led man to self destruction.

Here is an interesting thing, in what we call the Lord’s prayer. The main thing concerning sin is the word trespasses and if we do not forgive man their trespasses we will not know and experience the forgiveness of the Godhead. Matthew 6:9-13.

Here is the rub.
Satan is doing a ripe job of hiding from man that he is forgiven.
The church on the main has not told people they are forgiven. When people do not know they are forgiven they find it hard to be told they need to forgive.
We love Him because He first loved us.
I am totally forgiven. All the people in the world are totally forgiven. Sad to say few know it. I mean know that they know, not with their head but with their heart.
When people are told to forgive they react because they do not know forgiveness.

Unity does not arise from conformity. Unity arises from setting each other free to agree or not to agree. Like the word says we are all different members of one body with different functions.
Several things are happening.
People want all to agree they are right and all the rest are wrong, or
people who do not agree thinking they are keeping unity and piece by keeping silent, which is far from the truth.

For example one of our sons has told us where he is at with his relationship with a lady and her 2 children who are under the control of rejection. I have told him he is totally free to go down that track but I do not agree with his decision. For unity he needs to set me free to my choice not to agree.
Disagreement without judgment is a form of unity.
It is judgment that destroys relationships not the issue about which there is disagreement.
In the absence of judgment there is no broken relationship, even if both are going in different directions.

Man�s true freedom lies in his free will choice to follow God�s will and
thereby enter into the fullness of the relationship that exists between Father Son and Holy Spirit, who live in total harmony.
It is in this relationship than man will find full and true freedom.